Austin Lemieux

Lemony Couscous

A bright and tangy meal, like your girlfriends pussy after that gangbang she never told you about. A good side for a lot of eastern recipes and simple to make as a side dish.

Chicken Noodle Soup

Ever have a cold and wanted some chicken noodle soup? Well fuck Campbells, real men cook even when they're on the couch hemorrhaging blood. So get your ass out of bed and make some comfort food you little bitch.

Tomato Mushroom & Olive Tilapia

This is a fucking tasty and healthy one, not sure why I decided to throw this shit together but tilapia is cheap and kind of bland so figured this might be good. Read in to figure it the fuck out like I did.

Balsamic Roasted Brussel Sprouts

These little fuckers have a tang, so if you're ready for your taste buds to get some then try these guys out with your next meal.

Italian Sub

Ready for your wife to make you a sandwich? Well send her this recipe so she can kick you in the dick sooner than later.


Not a horribly difficult recipe to make, but a damn good comfort food. It'll taste like mom's cooking after your drunken dad beat you on a Friday night.

White Chocolate M&M Brownies

Fuck these are rich, but in a good way. When I bit into one my fucking teeth started rotting. Read in for how to make your own dental appointment.

Chimichurri Sauce

Basically Argentinian ketchup, this sauce makes for a great marinade and side with red meats, unfortunately if you're an Argentinian housewife you might break your man's dick giving him a handy.

Basil Pesto Salmon

Feeling brave? We're doing a pesto with a fucking mortar, better get ready to pretend it's your ex.

Chicken Piccata

A delicious and tasty meal in America, a basic bitch meal in Italy. Enjoy finding out how to woo your woman you fucking neanderthal.