Lemony Couscous

Posted 12/07/2022 By:

Austin Lemieux

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Israeli (Pearl) Cous Cous
Olive Oil
Chicken Stock
Kosher Salt
Black Pepper


I typically serve this with eastern dishes, but I guess whatever floats your fucking boat. Either way it's a tasty and easy side compliment to many dishes, kinda like your wife makes a tasty and easy side compliment for a lot of men. Serve it alongside fish or chicken and you might just get laid. But I doubt it if you're reading these recipes. Anyways, read on and maybe try not to fuck it up for once in your life.


First up, get your chicken stock boiling. It's usually a one to one ratio but check on the side of your cous cous to make sure, so if you want 2 cups measure out 2 cups of chicken stock. It'll probably say water but fuck that boring shit. Not fucking rocket science. Add some olive oil (or butter if you're a non traditionalist heathen) as well, probably about 2 fucking tablespoons is all you need.
Once that's boiling, go ahead and dump in your cous cous. Cover and simmer until it's fucking tender, overcooked and it'll probably burn like your soul after reading this, undercooked and it'll be harder than bubba's dick in prison. Get it right. It should soak up all the liquid like a tampon. 
Finally, and this part is hard, squeeze in your lemon juice, and add salt and pepper to taste. Go ahead and serve, can't fuck this up (or can you?)