Balsamic Roasted Brussel Sprouts

Posted 11/16/2022 By:

Austin Lemieux

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Brussel Sprouts
Balsamic Vinegar
Olive Oil
Kosher Salt
Black Pepper


A sweet and tangy side vegetable that goes with most things, they're incredibly easy to make once you get past the tedious part of cleaning up the fucking brussel sprouts. If you're not good with a knife you might want to have someone who isn't a fucking idiot do it for you. After that you're #winning like Charlie Sheen though, and your mouth hole will thank you for something other than the trash it's probably accustomed to if you're reading this in the first place.


Pre heat your oven to 400 (or maybe 425, I don't fucking remember you figure it out asshat.) Go ahead and trim the ends off your brussel sprouts, then split in half like that one girl you saw in the one porn that one time. You know the one, sick fuck.
Toss in a baking sheet and mix in the olive oil, seasonings and balsamic vinegar. Hard to fuck that up, if you do, maybe try cooking this instead. Measure with your heart obviously, if it tastes like shit you did it wrong, learn your lesson and try again.
Toss in the oven and bake until tendered than your limp dick after seeing your grandma. Easy peasy. Pair it with whatever feels like a fancy meal to you.